So until a couple days ago, I was having a hard time for the past few weeks being disciplined to read His Word. So the other night I got to thinking. I usually read the Bible on my bed.
     I guess that just doesn't create the best environment for devotion to His Word. So I created a little space of my own in the next room. 
     A little table and a wicker chair. A nice little old-fashioned desk lamp to set the mood :)) haha...but really. Also a lilac candle, I love the smell of lilac. Once Jesus took me to a lovely garden in prayer and there were purple lilacs. So it's OUR special thing :)). MY bible of course! My journal. My colors for coloring verses. Ohh and Bach and Chopin on my Pandora music station. Oh and my chai tea.
From here I was led to 1st John.
So the ninth verse of chapter one spoke to me.

"If we confess our sins, He is FAITHFUL and JUST to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."

Wow!
He made it so easy for us.

Can you imagine how He must feel when we don't just reach out to Him.

When He has done all the hard work and made a way.

And then I got distracted by my candle...

Fires trait is to consume. And in Hebrews it says He is a consuming fire.

So this is my prayer.

"Lord God I want to be consumed by you. That means surrendering everything. Trusting, being vulnerable. Not caring for myself. Leaving no thought of myself...

...consume me!"

The burning of the candle releases a fragrance pleasing to Him. I want so badly to please Him. And what pleases Him is so good for me. Sweet sweet LOVE, sweet sweet God.

He is like honey to my lips. SWEETER than honey and the drippings of the honeycomb. (Ps. 19)

Back to 1st John

2:15-17 "Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him, For all that is in the world-the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and the pride in possessions- is not from the Father but is from the world. and the world is passing away along with it's desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever.

3:9 No one born of God makes a practice of sinning, for God's seed abides in him, and he cannot keep sinning because he has been born of God.

satan tries to crush, but my Saviour always comes to the rescue.

And He places me on a higher ground than where I was before satan attacked.
Hallelujah! Praise to my King my Saviour.

Here is a snippet of a song from Samuel Cornell an eleven year old who wrote and played this song when he was ten. It's called "On The Cross" if you want to youtube it, it will bless your heart.
 "On the cross, He saved me, He healed me, and He took me in his arms and He loved me"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wiZihKoQduE

_________________________________________
So today satan was attacking me. I was in desperation, looking for an escape from the monotony of the same day lived over and over again.

This website speaks to where my heart was. And I do believe would especially touch the women readers.
 http://www.clairesteaparty.com/when-you-need-an-escape-route/

When I am down I like to read of stories of people far worse off than myself to right myself.
Such as the book Why? by Mrs D.S Sherwin. Even though I don't fully agree with her theology, her story in times of my despair has been my solice.
And when I wasn't saved I would watch Girl Interrupted, to feel a little more sane when I felt insanity gripping me.

So now I read Ecclesiastes.

Here are some jewels I found.

Ecc 1:8b "...the eye is not satisfied with seeing, nor the ear filled with hearing."

How true this is. We have to constantly be crucifying our flesh.

Ecc 10:1 "Dead flies make the perfumer's ointment give off a stench; so a little folly outweighs wisdom and honor.

WOW!

This calls me to live my life at a higher standard. I want to be a sweet perfume to a lost and dying world. I don't want to ruin the whole batch of ointment for some thoughtless act of stupidity.

This is such a great visual picture. To have all this wisdom and honor to be ruined by some little flies.

This verse gets to my soul better than the verse the reads, "a little leaven, leaven the whole lump."

This I think I will put on my mirror so that I will give thought in the beginning of my day. So that I won't ruin a sweet perfume over something not worth while.

 

Grace in the oddest places.

So I'm watching Castaway. The one where Tom Hanks gets stranded on a island.
There is a scene when he is sharing his inward struggle of survival on the island with his close friend after he's been saved.

" I had power over NOTHING. And
          that's when this feeling came over me--
          like a warm blanket. And I knew, not up
          here--

He means, not in his brain.

                     CHUCK (cont'd)
          --but in some deep part of me--I just
          knew--I had to stay alive. Even if I had
          no reason to hope. Even if my logic told
          me I'd never see any of this again.

"This" being the whole world he knew.

                     CHUCK (cont'd)
          And that's what I did, just kept
          breathing. 

          CHUCK (cont'd)
          That's all I did. Just stayed alive. And
          you know what? The sun came up, and the
          sun went down, and all my logic was
          wrong. Because the tide brought me--a
          sail.
There's a sense of hope here, a hard-won knowledge at the core of
life.

                     CHUCK (cont'd)
          Because tomorrow--the sun is going to
          rise, and who knows what the tide could
          bring?

This is grace to me. Because hope, this ^ doesn't exist without God.
Without the loving God of the universe.

It also called me to remember "these" times in my life. When I was in desperation, and the warm blanket of God's hope giving love enveloped me.

For you Oh God, are better than a thousand blooms!

You are still God

"How much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!" Matthew 7:11   

So my prayer today is this...            

 "Lord I am sorry when I doubt you forgive me. You truly are good, and You are still God." 

 and then of course i ask Him for the things I want. :) i really just want Him to reveal more of Himself to me, because nothing can make me happier than seeing my Lord more clearly. He is beautiful. He is Beauty!

Single Women-this is for you :))

This is from the book, "Falling in Love with Jesus".

Singleness...
1.It is not a disease.
2.It doesn't need a cure.
3.Don't give me anymore books on "How Not To Be Single."
4.Please don't try to fix me up with your brother-in-law, even though you know he is perfect for me.
5.And don't you dare tell me what beautiful babies Carmen and I could have together.(Carmen is a single Italian singer.)

Lord You're all I've got. 
Now the people in my life, small albeit, may be offended at that statement. 
But really You're all my spirit has. 
...sighs...                                                                                                             
Why and how do I go days without talking to you? 
You're my love. I begin to say, "I just wish You were..."  
*stops herself*  
I'm trapped to fleshy thinking. 
"I wish you were here with me in bodily form."  
But as the saying goes,(but is inadequate). I choose this saying to desribe Your greatness, compared to being with me in bodily form. Which is..
"You do me one better." Being in the flesh would limit You.   
"help me to not be so limited"  
"it is to your advantage that I go." John 16:4 Jesus speaking to some sorrow stricken disciples. Jesus saying that the Holy Spirit is to come down.
God would just be limited if I put Him into human form here on earth.
Any ways the world as I know it is not going to last an eternity, so I better get used to the spiritual realm which last for eternity.
"In the spiritual realm Lord is where you dwell, help me to have eyes in my spirit to see this spiritual realm."